![]() I cannot tell you whether Eddie Hall is the World’s Strongest Man or not, because World’s Strongest Man (the competition) is filmed in May and broadcast in December, and I’m not about to spoil World’s Strongest Man for you. Are you telling me you wouldn’t die? Like straight away? Are you kidding me? You’d be dead and leaking orange. Consider this: consider what drinking 20 litres of Lucozade would do to you, a normal human. So what I am saying is: Eddie Hall is very vast, and does things with tattoos and weight and Lucozade that would kill the average man. They very strongly advise you never put it on. "I put on two stone overnight," Eddie Hall says. I am saying that if you went through the recycling and counted the Lucozade bottles in there, you’d find like 40 Lucozade bottles, all consumed by Eddie. ![]() "Yeah I was getting ready – drinking more Lucozade." I don’t want to put words in Eddie Hall’s mouth, but I think what Eddie Hall is saying, here, is that in the course of about 16 hours he drank something like 20 litres of Lucozade. He tells me about his attempts the next day to lift the weight. ![]() "Actually, more: let’s just say there was a fresh 20-pack of Lucozade in my house… and then there wasn’t." Eddie Hall wiggles his mighty eyebrows as if to say: I drank more than a family pack of Lucozade in one night. "Actually," says enormous Eddie Hall, Eddie Hall the size of a medium-to-large house, or a small-to-medium monument. Eddie looks up and to the right for a moment, mentally calculating. "Yeah, like ten litres," Eddie Hall says. Like: one time, when Eddie Hall was getting ready to attempt the world deadlifting record, he drank 20 bottles of Lucozade before he went to bed. It is impossible to estimate how much he weighs, because weight grows warped and wrong when it approaches him. I am the most gigantic man to ever live.Įddie Hall is six foot, three inches tall. My hands are honestly spread to the width of my own face. On Eddie Hall, the Terminator looks small, round, dainty – like if you placed a digestive biscuit gently on your own puny human arm. I splay my hands over the Terminator face on his forearm. "That can’t be correct, Eddie Hall," I say. "It’d be big on a normal person’s back," Eddie Hall explains. "Not done yet," Eddie explains to me, saying that due to the sheer size of his arm – arms like tree trunks, arms like God got mad – he schedules three-hour sessions every Monday morning to get it inked, and it still isn’t done. "How long did the tattoo take, Eddie?" I ask Eddie Hall. Like: I notice a new tattoo on Eddie Hall’s arm. It is impossible to estimate how wide he is because perspective grows warped and wrong when it approaches him. Eddie Hall is six foot, three inches tall.
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